- It’s so random. I try to figure out where she is in time by the people she refers to. Sometimes she’s here today; other times, she’s in the 1950’s. The decade she is currently living in can change in a single visit. It’s wack-a-mole.
- In the last few weeks, my mom calls more and more asking why her mom isn’t listed on her phone for her to call. Her mom passed on several decades ago. Usually I say something like, “I haven’t spoken to her in a long time”, and mom figures out she’s gone. This makes her sad, but not inconsolable or too upset, and changing the subject helps … or talking about how awesome her mom was. (Truly, her mom was the best of the best.)
- Sometimes, after speaking to me for a while on the phone, she forgets who she is talking with. I get that, since there’s no visual clue.
- Yesterday was the first time she forgot me in person. But then I got to thinking, she may not have known me at all. When I arrived, they said, “Jean, your daughter Kim is here.” It isn’t bothering me because I keep hearing about this from the far too, too, too many who have already walked this path. Those who went before us on this journey are a great help in sharing their knowledge.
- Mom’s always been kind to those she doesn’t know well, so that’s a plus. She’s usually kind to me, but as her closest family member, I often get the brunt of all things that concern her in any way … and she can go from sweet to angry in a millisecond … and this is not new to Alzheimer’s … it’s just who she has always been with any of us descendants.
- Whether her ability to remember me is disconcerting to me or not, mom was very happy to go for a drive. She has always liked that. She was happy to go out even if we didn’t stop anywhere. Whether she knows me or not is not the priority. Whether she is happy or not is the priority, and the goal is for her to enjoy whatever time she has left.
- Any which way, we went for an hour drive to determine her stamina since she’s had COVID. She’s weak for sure. The cough seems to come and go. She’s also tired and her tummy is often upset. For now, I’ll just take her for drives to get out. I don’t want to wear her down and cause a relapse.
- Oh! Visiting hours have opened up. One still must wear a mask and have a recent negative COVID test. Otherwise, visitors are welcome most any time! Mom loves visitors. She’s a social being, and it’s not whether she remembers you are not (most of the time she’ll figure it out), but it’s about enjoying her while she’s here.