Stuffed … like an Animal after Taxidermy

22 Jan

Today I had to call an insurance company. There is nothing I despise more than NOT getting a real person on the phone when I’m already frustrated and have a question to ask. None of the options that (a) I am to enter by selecting number or (b) (much worse) speak a word or phrase applied to the situation.

This is how it went today.

  1. I needed to change the billing card on file for my prescriptions. It wouldn’t work. I followed the directions four times, and no go.
  2. Of course, the number for assistance is not on the website. The website says to contact the number for my prescription coverage on the medical insurance card.
  3. There is no number of the card for me, as a participant. It’s only for providers. I called that number, and they said to call my insurance company’s help desk. (Have you played “pass the buck” lately?)
  4. I called the insurance help desk, and they said they would forward me to the prescription coverage company.
  5. There I ran into the “speak only” system to supposedly direct me to the correct department. The options were to (a) request coverage, (b) pay a bill, or (c) submit a claim. No where was there an option to change the billing information or update the account. Each of these three options led me further way from the goal set about 45 minutes ago.
  6. I did my trick to get to a being of my own species on the telephone: I pressed 0 about a dozen times.
  7. Then I ended up on hold for about five minutes.
  8. When I finally had a real person, she couldn’t make it happen either.
  9. I was then transferred to her supervisor, who could also not make it happen.
  10. End result: I’ll receive a call back tomorrow or the next day.

Is this progress? I think not. I am so full of frustration, I feel stuffed like an animal after taxidermy.

Therefore, what am I thankful today?

  1. I did not swear (while talking to a person) during any of this.
  2. I did not break my pen while waiting on hold again and again.
  3. I survived to tell you about it!

And now I take my twitching eye and head to bed. Sweet dreams!

I am standing in the middle of a room of stuffed birds at the Chicago Natural Science Museum.

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Posted by on January 22, 2015 in Uncategorized


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